If you’re reading this, you might be facing the loss of a loved one and the process of trying to figure out what happens or what to do with their belongings. It’s a journey I’ve been through myself, and while it can feel overwhelming, I’m here to walk you through it step by step. This guide will help you understand if probate is necessary, how it unfolds in Tennessee, and what to consider when hiring a probate attorney. Let’s tackle this together.
What is Probate?
Probate is essentially a legal roadmap for transferring property that belongs to a deceased person into the name of a living person, often a relative, through the court system. While many people can avoid probate by using estate planning tools, it’s not always possible. Under very specific circumstances, it is a good idea to go through probate!
Does My Loved One’s Estate Require Probate?
Not every estate needs to go through probate. If your loved one had a funded living trust, or if their assets were held in joint tenancy or had designated beneficiaries, you might be able to bypass probate. However, if they owned assets solely in their name without a beneficiary designation, probate will likely be necessary. It’s a good idea to review the asset structure your loved one had in place to determine the best course of action.
If you aren’t sure what your loved one owned at the time of their death, it is a good idea to reach out to an attorney. Our attorneys at Graceful Aging Legal Services, PLLC can run a search to find out where assets might be held and if there are any likely outstanding bills. In the meantime, you will want to collect any mail that comes to the deceased to see if you can locate any assets.
The Probate Process in Tennessee
In Tennessee, the probate process begins by filing a petition with the county court where your loved one lived. The court will appoint a Personal Representative (often named as executor if there is a will) to oversee the estate. The Personal Representative plays a crucial role in ensuring that each step is completed accurately and in compliance with state laws.
We like to explain it the Personal Representative’s job as a three-step process:
Gather assets. This includes anything that is owned individually by the deceased person, including personal property from their residence, money in bank accounts, vehicles, and more. The Personal Representative (also called an “Executor”) will make an inventory of what your loved one owned so that everyone can be aware of what is in the estate. It’s important to remember that even if you are listed as the executor in a Will, you do not have any authority until the court officially appoints you. The Personal Representative will open an estate account with an FDIC insured financial institution in order to deposit assets as they are collected or proceeds from things that are sold.
Pay costs and creditors. In Tennessee, there is a specific formula for how probate estate funds are applied to expenses and debts. First, the costs of administration are paid. This includes all court costs, attorney fees, and other fees like storage or shipping. Second, funeral expenses can be paid. Third, any taxes or government claims are paid, including TennCare. Last, any debts that are filed against the estate and validated by the court are payable to those creditors. These are usually things like final medical expenses or credit cards.
Distribute to inheritors. Once all of the deceased’s assets are gathered and costs and creditors are paid, the Personal Representative will know what the final balance of the estate account is. In some cases, there isn’t enough money in the estate to pay all of the bills, and that should be discussed with the estate attorney. Otherwise, it’s time for what everyone has been waiting for- getting their money! The Personal Representative will divide the remaining balance into shares based on the Will or the law and distribute those amounts to those who inherit. The estate attorney will work with the Personal Representative and inheritors to collect statements that everyone has received their share, or if that cannot be done, to complete an accounting of the estate. Once all the paperwork is completed by the Personal Representative and inheritors, the estate attorney will ask the Court to close the probate estate.
Duration and Costs of Probate in Tennessee
The timeline for probate can vary widely, typically ranging from six months to over a year, depending on the estate’s complexity and any disputes that might arise. As for costs, these can include court fees, attorney fees, and executor fees, all of which depend on the size and intricacy of the estate. It’s important to budget for these expenses as they can add up quickly.
In most counties, just filing probate is $300-500. So if you can avoid probate while getting your loved one’s assets distributed appropriately, it’s a good idea. Most attorneys charge hourly for probate work, which can add up quickly. However, the estate attorney should have efficient processes to keep the costs as low as they reasonably can.
You can help the estate attorney by turning in all of your paperwork on time, replying to their questions, and helping to get documents signed by any other inheritors. We like to say that the more families delay or fight, the more money probate lawyers make. While differences are normal in families, remember that the more time an attorney spends dealing with disputes, the more money they make and less money is available to the inheritors.
Choosing a Probate Attorney in Tennessee
Finding the right probate attorney is like choosing a trusted partner for this journey. You’ll want someone experienced, transparent about their fee structure, and communicative. It’s essential that they’re approachable and willing to provide regular updates. If you have friends or family who have been through the process, ask them for recommendations. Check out google reviews and check the Board of Professional Responsibility’s attorney search to make sure an attorney is licensed and in good standing before you sign an agreement for them to handle your case.
Conclusion:
Probate can feel daunting, but with the right knowledge and support, you can manage your loved one’s estate with confidence and care. Remember, you’re not alone in this process. With a reliable attorney and a clear understanding of the steps involved, you can honor your loved one’s wishes and ensure their estate is handled with the respect it deserves.
If you have questions about transferring the assets of your deceased loved one, we’re here to help. Feel free to reach out to us for more information about your specific situation.
Death is an undeniable aspect of the human experience, yet it remains one of the least discussed subjects in our society. We avoid talking about it, even though we’re surrounded by death all our lives, and it’s the final transition we go through. By avoiding the topic of death, we miss out on opportunities to grow both personally and in our relationships with others. It’s only by confronting it head-on that we can truly find peace in the face of this inevitable transition.
Main Causes of Fear Surrounding This Transition
There are many reasons why thinking of our final transition might be scary, but one of the main causes could be that staying silent about it does us no favors. After all, we “fear the unknown,” and death is one of the greatest unknowns in life.
Grief may also impact our view of death. However, a big part of the pain of grief – again – is the fact that people don’t talk about it. When a loved one is no longer with you, you should talk about them to the people closest to you. To tiptoe around the elephant in the room is painful for everyone involved. The person you lost was a life – and, in many cases, a major part of your life. You can and should grieve that for as long as it takes.
It’s also important to prepare your kids for death by being honest about the reality of it.
If you can, start slow by saying that you’re sad because a pet died – or your friend died. If you’ve experienced a death in your family, letting your child be involved in the memorial can bring a great deal of peace, too. As is true in many other areas of communication, age-appropriate honesty and clarity are good rules of thumb.
To find peace in the face of death, we need to embrace our mortality and realize that this transition will happen to us one day. Acceptance and surrender are key parts of the process. By acknowledging that death is part of life, we can begin to let go of our fear and resistance. It is through acceptance that we can find meaning and purpose, knowing that our time is limited.
This allows us to prioritize what truly matters and live life to the fullest. Each moment becomes more precious, and we become more present and engaged.
Part of this is also to “death-proof” your life. Another reason death could scare us is because we don’t want life to end – we have so much left to do!
But if you live every day as if it’s your last by not putting things off, you will minimize the regrets you have as you face death. This also helps prevent regrets your loved ones could have from strained relationships. Treating every day as if it’s your last – and dealing with your unresolved anger – can be a huge step in the right direction.
Ruminating on death – as strange as it may sound – can also help. Caitlin Doughty of “Ask a Mortician” has an informative YouTube channel dedicated to unpacking death. She talks about historical and cultural traditions surrounding death and more.
You can plan for the practical aspects of death by asking yourself:
Do I want to be cremated, buried naturally, or embalmed – or something else?
What do I want my funeral service(s) to be like?
Is there anything I’d like in my casket (if not cremated)?
What pictures do I want to be shared at my funeral? (Create a shared album!)
What songs do I want to be played at my funeral? (Create a playlist!)
What do I want to be remembered for?
What do I want my obituary to say? (Write it yourself!)
Finding Peace in the Face of Death
Several strategies can help us find peace when confronted with the reality of death. Meditation and mindfulness can be powerful in fostering a sense of calm and acceptance. By focusing on the “now” and accepting our thoughts and emotions without judgment, we can remember the impermanence of life and find peace.
Connecting with nature is another effective way to find solace in the face of death. Time outdoors, surrounded by the beauty and wonder of the natural world, can remind us of the cycles of life and the interconnectedness of all living things. Nature has a way of putting things into perspective.
Spiritual guidance can also provide comfort and support. Whether through religious practices or personal beliefs, spirituality helps us understand and navigate the mysteries of life and death. Connecting with something greater than ourselves can bring a feeling of peace and purpose.
Support Systems
Strong support systems are vital throughout our lives. Family and friends can provide a great deal of emotional support and companionship during difficult times. Sharing our fears, worries, and emotions with loved ones can lighten our burdens and help us feel less alone in our journey.
Our support systems help us celebrate new life – and they help us cope with life lost. When loved ones have been on the brink of death (or even approaching unknown circumstances in their lives), friends and family show up early in the morning and late at night to support us, share resources, and provide light in an otherwise dark time.
If you’ve recently lost a loved one and have no idea what to say when they tell you, “Let me know if you need anything” (or if you’re the one asking), we’ve got you! Keep reading to learn how to sign up for our newsletter, where you can get helpful resources like “15 Ways You Can Help a Friend Who is Grieving the Loss of a Loved One”! (Coming soon!)
Therapy and counseling can also help you navigate the complex emotions that crop up when confronting death. A trained professional can provide guidance and help you process your feelings, offering tools and strategies for finding peace and acceptance. (Real talk: when April’s mother-in-law died, her therapist was the first person she called after the funeral home.)
Support groups are another valuable resource. Connecting with those who have experienced similar loss or are facing their mortality can provide a sense of belonging and understanding. Sharing stories can be cathartic and can offer new perspectives about your experience.
Legacy and Leaving an Impact
Thinking about our legacy is another way we can find peace. Documenting our personal stories, whether through writing or other self-expression, can help us reflect on our lives and leave a lasting impact. By sharing our experiences, wisdom, and lessons learned, we can inspire others. If you wonder what you’d be leaving unsaid if you died tomorrow, writing it out and leaving a message for the people you love can put your mind at ease.
Acts of kindness and service are another meaningful way to leave an impact. By choosing acts of love and compassion, we create a ripple effect that goes far beyond our own existence. Small gestures of kindness can bring comfort and joy to others, and they can also bring us a sense of fulfillment and purpose.
Building relationships is also crucial in finding peace in the face of death. Nurturing connections with loved ones and building meaningful relationships allows us to leave a lasting impact on the lives of others. When we invest in our relationships and foster deep connections, we can find solace in the knowledge that we have made a difference in the lives of those we love.
Maya Angelou once told a beautiful story of her Uncle Willie and the legacy he left. Chances are that her uncle never knew the great impact he left – not only on his niece but on the other people he interacted with.
Legacy is something that we are always unintentionally building. Build it well!
Finding Peace Through Planning for the Future
Embracing the journey and finding peace in the face of death is a deeply personal and transformative process. Acknowledging the reality of our mortality and embracing death as an integral part of life helps us find solace. Through practices like meditation, connecting with nature, seeking spiritual guidance, and leaning on our support systems, we can navigate the complex journey of confronting death.
Leaving a positive legacy and cultivating meaningful relationships can bring a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Ultimately, by embracing the journey and confronting death with an open heart and a willingness to explore the unknown, we can find peace, growth, and enlightenment.
Last week we looked at red flags you should pay attention to with regards to caregivers and professionals in your network. This week we’ll look at how to prevent abusive caregiver situations and how to deal with abuse once it has occurred. Below are some actions you can take to guard against people in your network taking advantage of you.
Things you can do now:
Take advantage of your free yearly credit report.
You can get a free credit report from each of the three credit reporting agencies (Experian, TransUnion and Equifax). Hot tip! Space them out! Sign up to get one every four months. This will make it easier to discover any irregular activity fairly quickly.
Ask your banker if they have completed the “BankSafe” program from AARP.
BankSafe is a training platform designed to help financial professionals identify and stop suspected exploitations from caregivers. Ask your bank if they have participated in this training. If your bank has not had this training, encourage them to do so! Or consider moving funds to a bank or credit union that has already participated.
Budget for paid assistance.
Remember that as much as family and friends may want to help, sometimes they can’t. It’s important to make sure that you are able to afford assistance for things like traveling to appointments, grocery shopping, laundry, nutritious meals, cleaning, and other personal help you may need if you were injured or developed a medical condition. Endeavor to have enough of your retirement savings to ensure you can afford a positive work environment for your future caregivers.
Create a Durable Power of Attorney
Create a Durable Power of Attorney.
This Power of Attorney allows someone you trust to monitor and manage your finances, if needed. This could be a family member or close friend. With access to bank accounts and credit card statements, they should be able to notice quickly if your spending habits change or if there is fraudulent activity on your account and they’ll be able to file a claim to protect your money!
Things to keep in mind for later:
Listen to your loved ones.
If you have a caregiver that is not in your family, do yourself a favor and trust a loved one’s opinion if they sense unsettling behavior from that caregiver. Sometimes others are able to see things that we are too close to observe.
Don’t become too reliant on one person.
You can have a housekeeper come every other week to clean the surfaces, a home health nurse to check on your health, and a food delivery service to prepare your meals or deliver groceries. Surround yourself with people who like their jobs.
Let family and friends know you welcome their visits and calls.
Tell them what has been going on in your life and find out what is going on with them. Maybe a few favorite snacks in the cupboard will even bring the grandkids by.
Let family and friends know you welcome their visits
Don’t give up your routines.
Self-care is so important, we all know that! If you feel yourself falling into a slump, get outdoors, go to the store, call a friend or ask someone for help. You deserve to be loved and to love yourself. No matter what anyone says, you are the conductor of your life.
“Stranger danger” isn’t just for children.
As adults we get comfortable interacting with all kinds of people, but remember that not everyone has your best interest in mind. Beware of helpful people who appear out of nowhere! Trust your instincts and listen to your inner-voice.
Don’t keep secrets.
If anyone tells you to keep a secret from your friends or family, something is very wrong. Red alert!
Report anyone who threatens to physically harm you.
Call the police and tell your trusted loved ones. There are no second chances when it comes to your personal safety.
Practice being assertive with others
Remember that “no” is a complete sentence.
If you are a people pleaser, practice different ways of saying “no” so you’ll be more comfortable in situations where you need to say it.
This week we are going to talk about why you need a medical power of attorney, even if your spouse is available to make decisions for you.
In a medical emergency, there is an assumption that your spouse would be the health care agent, make health care decisions, and deal with the hospital and doctors on your behalf. However, what happens when a spouse is separated, no longer wants to be in contact, or doesn’t agree with your health care values?
If this happened to you, would you still want them to make decisions for you? Do you want your adult children to make medical decisions for you? What if your spouse and children disagree on what type of treatment(s) you should receive? When faced with an emergency, please consider having your medical Power of Attorney already in place.
What happens if you don’t have a Medical Power of Attorney?
There are many situations that can arise when you become incapacitated or have a healthcare emergency. Even if it seems unlikely that your spouse would be disinterested in your health, it’s important to remember that your spouse may have trouble thinking clearly in an emergency or may also be seeking medical care. A medical Power of Attorney with an agent that is capable of making medical decisions, even in an emergency, can lower the risk and confusion regarding your medical decisions.
What is a Medical Power of Attorney and why you need one.
A medical Power of Attorney, also known as a Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare, is a document that allows you to appoint someone as an “agent” to make decisions about your health care. This agent will make decisions on your behalf if you become too ill or incapacitated. A medical Power of Attorney ensures that your wishes will be followed. We have an experienced estate planning and probate attorney here in Nashville who can help you customize these decisions and record how choices will be made.
Choose someone you trust to make medical decisions for you.
How to choose the best Agent for your situation
When you are choosing your medical agent for your Medical Power of Attorney, it is important that you choose someone you can trust to adhere to your preferences regarding your medical care. Discuss your wishes with your agent before they need to make any care decisions. Make sure that you have confidence that your Agent will make the right decisions about things you two have not discussed.
Don’t wait to create your medical POA.
Conclusion: Why everyone needs a Medical Power of Attorney
It is important to think about what you would want in a medical emergency. Do you want your spouse to always make decisions for you?
Designate ONE person authorized to make decisions for you if you are unable to make or communicate your wishes. Even if you want your spouse to make those decisions, it’s always a good idea to have a “backup” person. This backup person can help out with decision-making in case your spouse is unavailable when someone needs to step in.
Whatever you decide, you should have a Medical Power of Attorney. Write your power of attorney in conjunction with your advanced directive (also known as a living will). All of these documents are an important part of a well-thought-out estate plan.
Do you have a plan for emergencies? Do you want help putting your values on paper? Take our Virtual Estate Planning Challenge! This 7-part Challenge helps you brainstorm the important stuff before creating your estate plan. We had a ton of fun making it and think you’ll really benefit from it too.
One concern I frequently hear is a worry that the government will take assets from a loved one or take assets from an estate instead of family members inheriting it. These are valid concerns because there are specific instances where this can happen, but as a general rule, the government DOES NOT take assets unless they have a legal reason for doing so.
The State of Tennessee will not take your assets
There are a few instances where the government will take your assets if you die without a will. For example, if someone received Medicaid (TennCare) to pay for long-term care, if they owed back taxes, or if no family members can be located. But, as a general rule, the State of Tennessee is not going to take your assets.
Tennessee will find your closest heirs
The State of Tennessee has a statute that lays out how your assets will pass if you die without a will. Your assets will pass to what we call your heirs at law. Those are really the people that you probably think of as your closest relatives: your spouse, your children, your grandchildren, your parents, your siblings, your nieces and nephews, your cousins, and farther out. But it’s the close relatives that the state will seek out.
Generally, the government is going to look for anyone related to you before they get any money. I hope that sharing this information with you has given you a sense of relief if you were told inaccurate information elsewhere.
If you have other questions about your estate or that of a loved one, click here to schedule a call with us.
